


Splash goes my heart or How to seduce the man of your dreams in three (easy) steps

by Lucky_Moony



Category: Victoria (TV)
Genre: All the beach clichés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Jogging on the beach, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, Outrageous Flirting, Pining, Summer at the beach, Sunburns, Want fluff? Get fluff!, beach party, ultimate frisbee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-24
Packaged: 2019-06-23 21:32:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15615483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucky_Moony/pseuds/Lucky_Moony
Summary: During the summer holidays, Alfred Paget must work at the ice cream parlour of his local beach to pay off a ridiculous phone bill.It seems his whole summer is bound to be doomed until he meets Edward Drummond, the handsome lifeguard who has yummy abs and reads big books while on duty.





	1. Finding the man of your dreams

**Author's Note:**

> Here I go with yet again another ridiculously fluffy AU.  
> I’m spending a couple of days at the beach and this little fic begged to be written.  
> As always, English is not my first language, so there might be some spelling mistakes (yikes!)

Summer, Alfred thought, was overrated.

Particularly when you were forced to work at an ice cream shop that didn’t have AC during long and interminable hours in exchange for a ridiculously low wage.

It’s even worse when your parents are outrageously rich, and you technically don’t even need to work in the first place.

But here he was, working his ass off to pay the absurdly high phone bill he had earned by busting his data limit because he had tried to hook up with a very handsome Russian guy.

His parents had been so mad about it, they had asked him to pay the bill (about £1000 for a month!) in full before the end of July.

At twenty years old, it was the first time Alfred had ever had to work in his entire life and he might as well had lived another five years before he had to do so, if you asked him.

In fact, the only great thing about working at the ice cream parlour was his co-worker Wilhelmina Coke.

Which was a bit strange since he was used to being around the most popular girls at uni and Mina clearly wasn’t the type of girls he usually befriended.

The latter lacked a fashion sense and had a particular ability to act awkwardly at most times, but she was also extremely kind and considerate.

Her presence at the shop and her sweet smile were really making his days better.

Plus, she really had a gift with the soft serve ice cream machine which was even more perfect.

It was yet again a very hot and humid day in the parlour and Alfred was probably making his 10 000th ice cream cone of the day when Ernest Coburg, a renowned womanizer, and his usual fan club entered the shop to chill and show off.

As usual, as soon as Coburg had crossed the threshold of the shop, Mina had sighed and had stared at him with intense heart eyes.

She was constantly daydreaming about going out with him and Alfred did not want to sound mean or anything, but he was highly doubtful it would ever happen.

Mina wasn’t the type of girl who usually made Coburg’s head spin.

She had too much brain and not enough boobs, or so she thought was the reason why men like Ernest did not want to date her.

As another toddler was crying in the background because he had dropped his ice cream on the floor and Mina was sighing dreamily for the fifth time already, Alfred turned around to ask her for help with the damn frozen yogurt machine when he spotted _him._

Him being the most handsome man he had ever laid eyes on.

Clearly, angels were singing in heaven every time that gorgeous guy was smiling, talking or breathing

Alfred gasped loudly and was sure he was probably drooling as he stupidly continued to press on the machine’s buttons and the frozen yogurt cup he was filling was now on the verge of overflowing.

The hot guy had just sat down at Ernest’s table and he could hear some of the girls who were with them giggle like crazy.

‟Paget, snap out of it!” Mina exclaimed as she quickly swatted his hand off the machine, picked the yogurt bowl from out of his grasp and handed it over to a very very happy client.

Alfred gasped once more and blinked twice as she sighed with annoyance. ‟Who is that?”

‟He’s one of the new lifeguards at the beach.” Mina more exasperated than ever rubbed the bridge of her nose. ‟Get a grip on yourself Alfred, we still have a line-up of thirty customers to serve before we close down for the night.”

Alfred cursed as he glanced at the line and rapidly tried to put some order in his already carefully coiffed hair. ‟Mina, what do I look like?”

‟A gay mess.”

***

Edward Drummond had agreed to be a lifeguard at Newborough beach to help his uncle out, but he had never thought it would mean he would constantly be surrounded by girls and would receive thousands of invitations every day when all he wanted to do was crawl back to his uncle’s place and read.

As he sat down at Ernest Coburg’s table, he prepared himself for yet again another hour of forced social interactions.

Smiling and nodding was what he thought seemed to work best as he waited for the evening to end.

He could feel someone was staring at him and scanned the shop at once but couldn’t figure out who was doing it.

All he could see was that the two employees working behind the ice cream shop’s counter clearly seemed flustered.

He was grateful he was not in their shoes and forced a smile as a girl he had already forgotten the name of  began to talk about the new sexy swimwear she had just bought at _Coco de mer._

He was positive, the evening was going to be looooooooong.

***

‟Have you seen his lovely smile and his cute curly hair? And oh gosh, his beautiful hazel eyes and his big hands?” Alfred sighed dreamily as he balanced the cash drawer. ‟I’m not asking for much, I just want him to put them all over me.”

Mina rolled her eyes as she continued to sweep the floor. ‟Stop fantasizing and finish your job, will you? I’d like to get back home before midnight this time, if it’s not too much to ask.”

‟I’ve just spotted the man of my dreams and all you want me to do is to shut up and to go on with work as if nothing had happened.” He sighed dramatically as he began to wipe the tables of the shop clean.

‟Alfred, I don’t want to break your heart, but at this point the guy doesn’t even know you exist. Plus, he might not even be gay in the first place. I heard he dated Florence Kerr earlier this year.”

He gave her the stink eye. ‟ Mark my words Mina Coke, by this time next week, Edward Drummond will be mine.”


	2. Step 1: Get his attention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfred spends the day at the beach in the hope of catching Edward’s attention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> English is not my first language Xxx

Alfred had woken up extra early the day after he had seen Edward Drummond aka the man of his dreams for the first time at the ice cream shop.

He had dreamed about him the whole night (obviously) and couldn’t wait to see him on the beach with nothing on except his red lifeguard shorts.

Which would be a magnificent sight, he was sure of it.

He took a shower, checked his reflection in the mirror, fixed his hair, sprayed a ridiculous amount of cologne on himself and voilà, he was ready to go.

Then, he ran downstairs and greeted his family.

His parents were sitting at the kitchen table and were eating breakfast while his twin brother Septimus was sitting on the couch and was already hard at work on his laptop.

The latter was an intern in a law firm and he was taking his job very seriously.

As a result, he often brought work home.

Alfred and Septimus were identical twins except for their eyes. While Septimus had his father’s brown eyes, Alfred had his mother’s bright blue ones.

Alfred hummed a song as he went directly to the fridge.

Charlotte and Henry frowned at each other.

Not only was their son up early but he also seemed in a good mood which was very unusual.

‟Alfred, you literally are glowing today. Have you changed your mind about the horse race then?” Charlotte asked as Henry resumed reading his newspaper.

‟Oh no, I’m going to spend the day at the beach.” Alfred replied as he grabbed some food—a sandwich, a pasta salad and a chocolate pudding— from the fridge and placed it in his backpack.

Henry turned the page of his newspaper and stared distractedly at his youngest. ‟Are you heading to work then?”

‟Oh no. I’m just going to lie down on the beach. You know, get some sand around my toes and all that jazz.” He replied as he closed the fridge.

Should he bring a banana with him too or would that be considered as some outrageous flirting?

Septimus quirked an eyebrow at him ‟Lie down on the beach?  You hate sand.”

Charlotte frowned. ‟Are you going to spend the day with your friend Mina?”

Septimus blushed at the mention of the name and tried to hide that fact by hiding behind his computer’s screen; something that did not go unnoticed by both of his parents.

Since he was the one who usually picked Alfred up after work, he had seen Mina on various occasions and there was something about her that made his heart beat faster.

Alfred shrugged. ‟Oh no, she’s visiting her grumpy old aunt today.”

Nope, he decided, he would not bring a banana.

He could always use that tactic as a backup plan if he failed miserably today—which he highly doubted.

He zipped his backpack and carefully placed it on his shoulder.

‟When will you get back?” Charlotte asked as he leaned down to kiss her on the cheek.

He shrugged. ‟ I don’t know.” He gave his father a kiss too. ‟Don’t wait for me!”

He was already out the door when Henry dropped his newspaper on the table and stared at his wife.

‟There’s a boy behind this.”

Charlotte shook her head as she stared at the door. ‟There’s a boy behind everything Alfred does.”

***

It was close to 10.00 when Alfred finally arrived at the beach, which was perfect since the lifeguards were on duty from 9.30 to 5.00.

Obviously, Edward would have fallen under his spell by noon and they would then spend the rest of the day snogging and frolicking in the sand.

Or so Alfred thought was what was going to happen.

Sadly, the thing was that the beach was so vast that by 11.00 he still hadn’t found where Edward kept watch.

He wondered with a pang if the latter might have had the day off—which would be disastrous—when finally, he spotted him from afar.

He had no doubt about it; it really was him.

And oh, what a glorious sight he was!

His curly brown hair was shinning under the sun, he was holding a big boring book in his hands and his delicious set of abs was on display.

Alfred sighed dreamily, and his heart began to sing.

 _Stay calm and look hot,_ he thought as he casually walked up close to Edward’s chair.

Which turned out easier than he had thought.

All he needed to do now was to find the perfect spot to lie down and to look handsome.

He needed to not be too far from him so Edward could clearly stare at him and be seduced by his cute sight, but he also needed to not be too close either because he did not want to look as desperate as those stupid girls who were giggling and lounging about only a meter away from him.

He pulled his red beach towel out of his bag, dramatically unfolded it and carefully placed it in the sand.

He then placed his bag over the words that were etched on it which were _I’m too fancy_ , because his mum had bought the towel as a gift for his birthday and he would be damned if the first thing Edward Drummond found out about him was the fact that he was high maintenance.

Which he wasn’t, really.

Or so he thought as he put his expensive square framed black Burberry sunglasses back on.

He only happened to have good taste, which really wasn’t the same thing.

Alfred then took his shirt off (okay he wasn’t as ripped as Edward was, but he still didn’t look that bad either) and pulled his jeans off too to reveal his ultimate weapon: his blue and white low-rise fit boxer trunk swimwear.

The two older ladies who were sunbathing the closest to him were positively ogling him at that point, which seemed to augur well.

He applied some sunscreen on his skin—which was very sensible to sunburns— and settled down on his towel, careful to show Edward his best profile in the process.

***

Two hours later, Edward was still reading his book and did not seem to be swooning at the sight of him yet.

Alfred had even taken The Iliad, his favorite book, out from his backpack and had switched position to rest on his belly so Edward could stare at his cute little butt—which both Victoria and Harriet, his best friends, had said was his best asset—and yet nothing had happened.

Nothing except the fact that he was sweating like crazy and was starting to feel as though he would be cooked by the end of the afternoon.

He sighed as he reconsidered his plan.

The giggling girls were still sitting close to Edward and wore ridiculously small bikinis, yet his gorgeous hunk was still reading his book instead of staring at them, which seemed like a good sign, right?

He was wondering what he should do next when a random guy walked up to him and waggled his eyebrows at him as he asked if he needed some help to apply some lotion on his back.

Which he would really have enjoyed if it had been Edward who had asked him that in the first place.

But nope.

It was just a random guy.

A random and very ordinary guy.

He as politely as possible declined the guy’s proposition and decided to dash for the sea, seeing the latter had decided to lie down close to him.

He was mid-thigh in the waves, wincing at how cold the water was when a ridiculous thought crossed his mind.

He should do something banned.

That way, Edward would need to close his book, whistle, walk up to the edge of the sea, ask him to get out and then would be incredibly turned on by the sight of him getting out of the water and dripping wet. Besotted, he would then carry Alfred out of the water and they would kiss and grope on the beach until the end of time.

In short, this was a perfect plan.

He had just swum past the buoys when he heard someone whistle and yell at him.

He turned around and tried to flash Edward a sexy looking contrite smile when he saw it wasn’t Edward who was yelling at him from the shore.

It was Ernest Coburg.

‟HEY PAGET! DON’T GO TOO FAR, OR ELSE, I’LL NEED TO GO AND GET YOU AND THAT WOULD BE AWKWARD FOR THE BOTH OF US!” The latter yelled as his fan club laughed loudly in the background.

It seemed Edward was out for lunch and Ernest was substituting for him.

Ten minutes later, Alfred sighed as he sat back down on his towel and decided to eat his own lunch too.

At least the random guy that was hitting on him had vanished, which was a good thing since he did not want anyone to see he was eating his chocolate pudding first out of desperation.

***

It was close to 2.00 when Edward finally came back from his lunch break.

The sun was still very hot, and Alfred could see some freckles had appeared on his arms, which meant he was slowly but surely getting toasted.

The giggling girls were gone to giggle somewhere else and the random guy had not come back to flirt with him, which were both a big big plus.

His mum had texted him three times already and he had yet to reply to her.

He was now having serious regrets of not having brought the banana with him at this point.

He was about to abandon and to head back home when a good idea crossed his mind.

It was better than good: it was a brilliant idea.

What if he went into the water and acted as though he was drowning?

Edward would need to come and rescue him with his strong muscular arms.

He could already envision the scene clearly as he walked up to the sea.

He checked over his shoulder one last time just to be sure Edward really was on duty and would be the one who would come to his rescue and then jumped in the water.

He then swam as fast as he could away from the shore.  

When he felt like it, he tried to look as though he was tired and waved his arms in the air with despair.

He was a pro at this since he was a bit of a drama queen at heart.

He upped his game a notch to be even more convincing, just as one of the two old ladies who were ogling him on the beach swam up to him and quickly seized him by the arms.

‟Don’t worry lad, I’ve got you.” The lady said as she hugged him tightly and slowly dragged him to the shore.

‟Eh, thanks…” He replied as he avoided her gaze.

She looked like she was a hundred years old and he clearly did not want her to die because she had been kind enough to try to save his life when he wasn’t really in danger in the first place.

‟If you need mouth to mouth, I’m all for it.” She added with a wink as he shuddered.

‟No, that’s a very kind offer but it won’t be necessary. I’m perfectly fine.”

Head down, he quickly walked back to his towel as the two old ladies were cackling loudly and wolf-whistling in the background.

He was just picking his stuff up, feeling defeated and sad, when someone walked up to him.

He really hoped it wasn’t the random guy or worse, the lady, back to give him a kiss.

As he turned around his heart skipped a beat.

Edward was standing a mere meter away from him and looked handsomer than ever.

His work shift was over and an older looking man was waiting for him in an old rusty car on the edge of the beach.

Edward flashed him a gorgeous smile and Alfred was now sure of it; his legs had just turned into jelly.

‟I really don’t want to bother you, but you have a massive sunburn on your back. This is going to hurt like crazy tomorrow.” Edward paused as he brushed one of his curl out of his eyes. ‟You should apply some aloe vera on it. You’ll see, it’s very effective.”

Alfred blinked twice and was sure his brain had stopped functioning properly. ‟Yeah, I’ve got delicate skin.”

Edward smiled once more and Alfred thought he would swoon. ‟My uncle is waiting for me, but I’m sure we are going to see each other again. Don’t forget: aloe vera!”

And with that he was gone, and Alfred was now sure of it, he needed to be in Edward’s arms and hell in his bed, where he belonged, and the sooner the better.


	3. Step 2: Show interest in his hobbies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfred (finally) spends some time with Edward but things don’t turn out as planned…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm having a &%$!@#$?@ week but I am on a writing roll, which helps a bit!
> 
> Comments and kudos are LOVE!

Alfred was sulking as he punched in at work.

He had had a rough night and his sunburn literally was killing him.

His whole back was a deep shade of red and his brother had told him he had seen some blisters on it as well.

His mother had applied aloe vera on his sunburn twice already—it seemed Edward wasn’t just handsome, he was also knowledgeable, which was even sexier—and wasn’t proud of him.

She had asked him if a boy was behind his strange behaviour, but he had strongly denied it.

After all, said boy wasn’t his yet and he did not want his mum to meddle into his love life.

He was able to mess it perfectly well all by himself, thank you very much.

He had shown Mina his back as the two were changing into their uniform in the back store of the parlour and she wasn’t impressed by his poor judgement either.

She was extremely worried about him, and was about to tell him so, when their boss, who always seemed to be in a bad mood, ushered them back to work.

Twenty minutes later, as they were serving customers left and right, they finally managed to continue their conversation.

‟Are you sure this guy is worth getting a skin cancer Alf?” Mina shuddered as he winced since his shirt had brushed against his sunburn. ‟ I mean from what you’ve just told me he doesn’t seem very interested in you…”

Alfred shrugged as he handed his next customer, an enthusiastic mother with two toddlers pulling at her skirt, two small blue raspberry slushies.

‟It’s because you haven’t seen his abs yet. If you did, you’d understand why I am doing all of this.” He replied as she rolled her eyes and sighed.

The ice cream shop was even crazier than usual today since it was the famous buy one, get one free sale and it seemed everyone on the beach had heard about it.

Clients were trying to skip the line and were yelling and pleading to be served first as if their mothers had never taught them any manners.

Just to add a freaking cherry on top of the flipping cake, they had just run out of pistachio soft serve and even though it wasn’t usually one of the most popular flavors, it seemed today everyone wanted some.

Ernest Coburg was sitting in the back of the shop with his fan club while Septimus, hard at work on his computer once more, was furtively glancing at Mina from the entry.

She was sweating, and her French braid was getting loose at the end as she dashed to scoop out some more gelatos.

It had already been the fourth time in the last hour that Alfred had to argue about the pistachio shortage and he was literally one nanosecond away from quitting his ridiculous job.

He was cursing as the frozen yogurt machine was once again making fun of him, when a customer who probably had cut down the line like it was no big deal, walked up to the counter to talk to him.

‟I’m sorry.”

‟I’m not.” Alfred replied coldly. He did not even turn around to face the customer since he was too busy trying to understand what was going on with the machine. ‟Go and wait in line like everybody else.”

‟Hum...Alf,” Mina began as he stared darkly back at her.

The customer cleared his throat. ‟Well I will, but I just have a small thing to a-”

‟ _No_ , we bloody don’t have any more damn pistachio ice cream.”

Low chuckle. ‟Which is perfectly fine by me. My favorite is vanilla anyway. I just wanted to know how you are doing with your sunburn and everything?”

OMG, IT WAS EDWARD!

VNRNOKDSMMMBPKD, EDWARD DRUMMOND WAS TALKING TO HIM!

Alfred blushed and gasped loudly as he turned around to face him. ‟Oh, Hi!” he leaned against the countertop and tried to look both cute and hot at the same time.

Which was easier said than done when you had a smudge of ice cream on your left cheek and you were wearing an ugly green polo shirt with a ridiculous logo on it.

Edward smiled—oh, such a cute smile— and stared at him with his dark hazel eyes. ‟Did you try the aloe vera?”

‟Oh yes, I did.” Alfred smiled back as he leaned against the frozen yogurt machine this time and tilted his head on the side. ‟Thank you for suggesting it.”

Edward scratched the back of his head and cleared his throat. ‟I was wondering if by any chance you like to exercise and such?”

 _Oh oh_ , Alfred thought, sport wasn’t his strong point.

Looking at hot guys engaging in sportive activities, that he liked.

Doing said sport himself? Hum, not so much…

‟Oh yes, absolutely. I love to run on the beach.” He batted his eyelashes and tried to seem thrilled by the prospect of it.

Which was a lie. A big, big lie.

Mina rolled her eyes as she passed in front of him to grab some more waffle cones from the back store.

‟Good. Maybe we could go together? At what time do you usually run?”

‟Oh, no specific time. It’s as you please, really.”

‟Alright, so tomorrow at 6.00?”

Alfred frowned, _b_ _ut sexily_. ‟6.00 pm? Won’t it be hot?” _like you_ , he added mentally.

Edward chuckled. ‟You are funny! No, at 6.00 in the morning, of course.”

‟Perfect! There’s nothing I like better than to train early in the morning.”

He probably was the first person saying this EVER and wasn’t sure he sounded convincing.

Edward seemed to believe him, which was excellent that way. He batted his eyelashes some more and smiled.

His boss was beginning to give him the stink eye and some customers were now angrily yelling in the background.

Mina stared at him with panic as she saw people were now lining outside the shop.

Edward seemed to notice this for the first time too.  He scratched the back of his neck and turned around. ‟I’ll leave you to work. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

Alfred sighed dreamily as his crush left and sat back down at Ernest’s table.

***

Waking up at 5.00 is a torture and it’s even worse when your room is adjoined to your twin brother’s and you both share the same restroom.

It’s even worse ++ when said twin brother is already up at this ungodly hour and is giving you a knowing look.

Which Alfred blatantly ignored as he picked his clothes up—a navy blue jogger pants and a simple white t-shirt— and closed the door behind him with all the dignity he could muster.

He was already feeling some butterfly flutter in his stomach as he tiptoed through the kitchen.

Which was unnecessary, since his mum was already up and was eyeing him suspiciously behind her cup of coffee.

‟Are you still going to tell me there is no boy behind this?”

He flashed her a cocky smile. ‟There might be a boy behind this.”

Charlotte sighed. ‟Do you want me to drop you at the beach on my way to work then?”

‟You would be the best mama in the whole wide world…”

She rolled her eyes as she took a sip of coffee. ‟As if this wasn’t already the case.”

He kissed her on the cheek as a simple answer.

***

Thirty minutes later, Charlotte was dropping her youngest at the beach.

As Alfred had suspected it, the beach was almost empty at this hour except for some other crazy joggers and some tired looking mothers who were pushing their strollers around in the hope that their babies would drift back to sleep soon.

Edward was doing push ups as he was waiting for him and Charlotte whistled as she spotted him.

‟Oh my, you’ve got good taste Alf.” Charlotte winked at her youngest as he rolled his eyes. ‟Don’t forget to tell me what his favorite meal is for when he’ll come over to visit!”

He  flashed her a grin and gave her a thumbs up as he got out of the car.

He tried to look cool as he walked up to Edward, which wasn’t that easy to achieve when you were twenty years old and your mother was blowing you a kiss in the background.

Edward smiled as he spotted him. ‟Hey!”

‟Hey, I’m sorry for being late.”

‟No problem. Do you want to do some stretches first?”

Edward was already deliciously sweaty from his workout and Alfred was pretty sure he was on the verge of passing out.

Hell, he could already feel some sweat rolling down his back and he had done nothing so far.

He shook his head and tried to focus on their conversation instead of on Edward’s biceps. ‟I already did some at home.”

Well it wasn’t a complete lie.  He had stretched like twice upon waking up.

That counted for something, right?

Edward flashed him his trademark warm smile as they both began to jog.

At first, Alfred was able to follow his running pace.

For about 2.3 seconds.

It all went downhill pretty fast after that.

He was huffing and puffing after 5 minutes of jogging and Edward was already far away in front of him.

He even had to turn around and to run back to meet him.

Edward looked concerned. ‟ Are you alright?”

‟Oh yeah. I’m doing just fine.” Alfred managed to reply after coughing three or fifteen times.

‟You can go and sit down while I finish my run.” Edward shrugged. ‟Some days are just like that.”

Or all days were like this, Alfred thought, but just smiled back and sat down on the first bench that crossed his path, stating he had too much sand in his shoes to go on.

***

‟Did you bring some changing clothes? I’m supposed to be on duty in about an hour, but we could go and change quickly and then grab a bite or something if you want.” Edward scratched the back of his neck. ‟That is if you don’t have any other plans.”

Alfred stared at him blankly as his brain was trying to register what the latter had just said.

What could be better than hanging out with Edward and possibly see him change his clothes?

His mouth went dry. ‟Of course.”

They were about halfway to the beach’s public changing room when Ernest Coburg spotted them.

He was playing a game of ultimate frisbee with some of his fangirls who really seemed  to be dressed in a different sexy swimwear every hour of the day.

‟HEY, DRUMMOND, PAGET! WHY DON’T YOU COME OVER HERE AND JOIN US FOR A GAME?” Ernest yelled as Alfred was already having some serious doubts about joining the game.

Watching a game of ultimate frisbee was okay.

 Playing it? Hum…not so much.

In the end, he went for it anyway, because Edward seemed thrilled by the idea and he was smiling so much it literally was impossible to say no.

As both teams lined up, Alfred doubted Lydia Bennet’s tiny bikini top would hold her breasts in place effectively much longer if she kept bouncing around like that.

He cleared his throat loudly as he thought about all the _Be gone, thot_ memes his older brother George kept sending him, but since he was a gentleman he smiled politely at her.

She clearly seemed to be interested in Edward, as she too was batting her eyelashes at him and was flipping her hair like crazy.

Alfred was just telling himself how he loathed her for the fifteenth time already, when the game finally begun.

Everything was surprisingly fine at first, since Edward was pretty good at throwing frisbees, while he wasn’t too bad at catching them.

In fact, the game was turning out way more fun than he had imagined it to be.

Here he was, on the beach, engaging in a sportive activity before 8.00 in the morning and he was LIVING.

Until he grew overconfident and a frisbee struck him on the nose with a loud BAM!

Of course, his nose bled a bit and he soiled his white t-shirt.

He walked off quickly to the nearest bench, wondering if he should lean forward or lean backward to stop the bleeding as both Lydia and Ernest were laughing their ass off like real jerks in the background.

He managed to text his twin brother even though he was on the verge of dying and sent him a dramatic picture of his bleeding nose, asking him to come and pick him up ASAP.

***

While Alfred was sitting with an ice pack nudged against his face, Edward was awkwardly sitting next to him and was rubbing the back of his neck.

This was how Septimus found them ten minutes later as he parked his car.

At least, Alfred’s nose had stopped bleeding but his left eye was now swelling up.

Edward blinked twice as he stared in turn at the two brothers.‟Oh, you have a twin brother?”

Alfred nodded. ‟Septimus, Edward. Edward, Septimus” both boys shook hands.

Edward cleared his throat awkwardly. ‟Since your brother is here, I think I’ll go because I’m supposed to be on duty pretty soon.”

Both Pagets watched him leave in silence.

Then, Septimus sat down next to his twin and crossed his arms. ‟Alfred, I think if you look up in the dictionary for _gay disaster_ you'll find a picture of your face instead of a definition.”

Alfred couldn’t care less about his brother’s teasing now. He was in full panic mode. ‟What do I look like? Am I completely disfigured?”

Septimus frowned and studied his twin’s face for a minute. ‟Well, it’s not _too_ bad.”

‟It’s not?” Alfred let out the breath he was unconsciously holding.

‟Well, to put it simply, your left eye is very puffy right now and it’s kind of beginning to bruise.”

Alfred groaned loudly. ‟My life is over.”


	4. Step 3: Make a move

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s a beach party and guess who is invited??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s my birthday today :D Here’s another chapter to celebrate Xxx

Because of the buy one, get one free sale, the ice cream shop was empty on Thursday.

Both Charlotte and Mina had helped Alfred to cover his black eye with makeup and the results were surprisingly good.

He was leaning against the soft serve machine as he waited for his interminable work shift to end (Mina had the day off) when Ernest Coburg crossed the threshold of the shop.

He nodded in Alfred’s direction. ‟Paget.”

‟Coburg.”

The latter was all by himself which was extremely unusual…

Where was his fan club and more importantly: how did he manage to get rid of it?

Ernest looked left and right and avoided Alfred’s stare as he walked up to the counter. ‟I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for the black eye.”

Alfred quirked an eyebrow at him but remained silent. Ernest wasn’t usually the type of guy who asked for forgiveness.

‟Look man, I am really sorry. Deep down, I am a big softie and I really hate how I’ve mocked you yesterday. I just wanted to impress the girls. You know how it is.”

Alfred shrugged.

Mocking others to impress girls?

Nope, that wasn’t something he was able to relate to.

Ernest cleared his throat. ‟I’m throwing a super secret beach party tomorrow night and I was wondering if you’d like to come?” He smiled.  ‟There will be tons of hot chicks and booze.”

Alfred frowned.

A beach party?

With tons of girls AND alcohol?

That wasn’t his kind of party.

He was about to tell him so, when Ernest added something that would change Alfred’s mind instantly. ‟Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you: all the lifeguards are going to be there too.”

WHAT? Had he heard right?

Alfred tried to look indifferent but deep down, he was freaking out. ‟All the lifeguards are going to be there? Even the new ones?”

A beach party was dull.

A beach party attended by Edward Drummond was a completely different thing.

Alfred’s heart was racing but he yawned and slowly checked his watch to seem composed.

There was no need for the world to see how of a gay disaster he was, right?

Ernest nodded. ‟Yep. Party starts at dusk.” He frowned as he studied the menu. ‟Now that that’s settled, can I get a big pistachio ice cream?”

***

The next morning, Alfred was literally bouncing off the walls.

He was tired of waiting for something to happen between him and Edward, and tonight, he would man up and try to pull a move on the latter.

He was humming a song as he was packing his backpack for the beach party while Septimus was staring at him strangely.

His twin had even closed his precious computer to be able to study what he was doing more closely. ‟What exactly are you packing?” he asked as Alfred shrugged and wondered what pair of shoes he should wear tonight.

‟Stuff.”

Septimus rolled his eyes. ‟Does this have to do with your crush, _Edward_?”

‟Why do you always think everything has to do with-” Alfred sighed as his twin quirked an eyebrow at him. ‟ YES, IT DOES!”

‟You really are in deep.” Septimus shook his head. ‟Alfred, it’s a beach party. You are not going to wear that hat.”

‟But I look good with it and it fits with my shorts!” He whined as his brother groaned loudly out of exasperation.

Being fashionable was hard work and clearly, Septimus wasn’t getting it.

The latter frowned suspiciously. ‟Aren’t you supposed to work and to close the shop tonight?”

‟Are you keeping track of everything I do now?” Alfred tried to look outraged, but Septimus wasn’t buying it.

He pointed to Alfred’s work schedule that was pinned on his bulletin board, next to a picture of a shirtless actor Septimus had forgotten the name of and of a big heart with Edward’s name written in the middle of it Alfred had doodled when he was daydreaming at work.

Alfred shrugged. ‟I am going to tell my boss I have a fever and that I need to get back home or something.”

‟And you are going to leave Mina all by herself?” Septimus did not seem impressed by this and gave his twin the stink eye.

Yep, Alfred thought, his brother clearly had a crush on his friend Mina.

Which might turn out to be a good thing because she was too good for Ernest Coburg anyway and having her as a sister-in-law would be glorious.

Alfred rolled his eyes. ‟She was the one who suggested it in the first place!”

He stuffed another hat and a second pair of flip flops in the bottom of his bag, just in case, as Septimus stormed out of his room mumbling something incomprehensible on his way out.

Now, should he bring a second shirt or what?

***

Friday afternoon, the ice cream shop was back to its usual busy self as Mina was running left and right behind the counter. For once, her boss was helping her out and was scooping ice cream too, which was a nice change.

Said boss seemed relieved as his second employee walked back into the shop earlier than expected after his lunch break. ‟Paget what is going on with you? You still have 5 minutes left to your break. Are you feeling well?”

‟I’m perfectly well sir.” The blond smiled pleasantly at his boss and resumed his work as Mina too seemed very surprised to see him back so soon.

Being on time wasn’t usually one of Alfred’s strong points.

Cumberland frowned at both of his employees one last time before he left them to their work and walked back to his office, slamming the door behind him.

As soon as their boss had disappeared, Mina pulled her co-worker aside.

Clients were starting to grow impatient in the queue, but she needed to find out what was going on.

After all, they had a plan. Why wasn’t Alfred sticking to it?

‟Weren’t you supposed to sneak out and go to Coburg’s party?” She studied her best friend’s face and frowned. ‟Wait a second; you are not Alfred. What are you doing here Septimus?”

Septimus smiled and began to nervously scratch his hair. ‟I’m covering for him. I did not want to leave you all by yourself while Alfred was out running after his man.”

Mina smiled at him and he was pretty sure he was blushing when Cumberland opened his door and barked at them.

‟PAGET, COKE! LESS TALKING, MORE ICE CREAM MAKING!”

***

Finally, the party was happening, and it was the most cliché thing Alfred had ever been to.

Girls were wearing tiny little skirts and quasi-inexistent bikini tops. There was loud 90’s music playing in the background and someone had even brought a makeshift BBQ built out of a tin can and was trying to cook hot dogs with it.

There was an alcohol-soaked watermelon to eat and some coconut rum drinks with pineapple bits floating in them to get sloshed and Nancy Skerrett was handing ice creams to everyone.

Alfred grabbed one because it could always be handy if he ever was desperate enough to lick it right in front of Edward.

Which he was totally willing to do at this point.

A big bonfire was going on a little farther down the beach and Edward was sitting right in front of it with Lydia Bennett.

Of course, Lydia’s boobs were once more on display.

She was leaning against Edward as she giggled for no valid reason at everything he was saying, and the latter did not seem to hate the attention he was getting.

Alfred rolled his eyes and sighed as he wondered if he had done the right thing by showing up to this ridiculous party.

He was about to leave when Edward, who seemed to see him for the first time since his arrival, waved at him.

Alfred wondered if he should play hard to get and ignore him or if he should just run up to him, sit down next to him and shamefully lick his ice cream right in front of his nose.

Hum…Second option seemed very tempting.

He really was THAT desperate.

He was about to put his plan into action when Ernest Coburg, the life of the party who was just back from his make out session with Tess Redgrave, suggested they played a game of Volleyball.

Alfred wasn’t sure if it was such a good idea for him to play.

After all, one black eye was enough for one’s lifetime.

Everyone seemed to think Ernest’s idea was fantastic though.

As they all were splitting into two teams, Edward literally appeared at Alfred’s side.

He flashed him his trademark smile; the one that made Alfred’s heart melt. ‟I’m so glad Ernest invited you. I was the one who suggested you should come.”

Alfred could feel his heart flutter in his chest and his palms were clammy and it wasn’t just because of his melting ice cream. ‟Really?”

‟How is your eye? And your sunburn?”

Was Edward blushing or was he just red because he had drunk too much rum?

Alfred tried to avoid doing heart eyes at him, but it was already too late.

Gosh, Septimus was right: he was in way too deep. ‟Both are doing great. Thank you for asking.” He managed to smirk without drooling, which was a feat in itself because being so close to Edward was doing things to his brain.

Edward chuckled, and Alfred thought that maybe the latter was flirting with him.

Maybe.

He was contemplating that incredible fact when Lydia Bennet materialised between them.

‟Paget, I think you’ve messed things up. It’s not a Halloween Party, but a beach party! With your black eye, you look like a raccoon.” She cackled loudly as Edward tried to move away from her, but she snatched his arm anyway.

Oh, how Alfred hated her.

Ernest shrugged, unaware of the drama that was unfolding right in front of him. ‟Folks, are we going to play or what? Drums? Lydia? Nancy? Paget?”

‟Who would want Paget on his team, honestly?” Lydia rolled her eyes and pointed at Alfred with her perfectly manicured nails. ‟The only balls Paget likes to play with are not the ones we are going to throw at each other; if you get what I mean…” She sneered, and others began to laugh too.

What a bitch!

Alfred hated to use that word, but there was no other way to put it: Lydia Bennett was a complete bitch.

He decided he had had enough of that toxic environment and of that ridiculous lame ass party.

He rolled his eyes, grabbed his backpack as some were still laughing while others, like Nancy Skerett, seemed ashamed by what Lydia had just said and hotfooted it off to the nearest bench.

Funnily enough, it was the same bench he had sat on when he had tried to jog with Edward.

It seemed the latter wasn’t the man for him after all and he was finally coming to term with it.

***

His mum was supposed to come and pick him up soon now.

He had been looking distractedly at the waves crashing on the shore for a while when Edward plopped down next to him on the bench.

‟Hey!”

‟Hey!” Alfred replied without looking at him. ‟ I thought you would be playing Volleyball?” He tried not to sound too salty. ‟ Lydia will be missing you if you are gone too long, you know.”

Edward began to rub the back of his neck once more, something he really seemed to be doing a lot around him. ‟Gosh, I really don’t know how to say this to you or anything…”

‟Say what?” Alfred sighed. ‟That I s-”

What he was about to say, no one would probably ever know because he was silenced by Edward who had suddenly closed the distance between them and had pressed his soft and warm lips against his.


	5. Celebrate your success

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys finally talk together and are officially an item.

What?!

**WHAT WAS GOING ON?!?**

Alfred’s heart was beating so fast he was sure it was about to implode.

Or was he already dead and had he just woken up in heaven?

Edward Drummond’s hands were cupping his face because he was kissing him RIGHT NOW and it was EVERYTHING.

In fact, Alfred was sure this kiss was the sweetest and most perfect kiss he had ever received in his entire life.

After a few seconds, slowly and hesitantly they broke apart from each other.

Alfred was feeling like the gay mess he truly was, but he barely had time to catch his breath; let alone to have some coherent thoughts before Edward claimed his mouth for a second kiss.

And this time it was a tad more passionate.

Hotness level: +++.

Edward’s hands roamed over his body—finally— and Alfred tangled his hands in his curls.

And oh damn, he wasn’t disappointed.

Those curls were even softer than he had imagined them to be in his dreams.

In fact, he wasn’t even sure if he hadn’t fallen asleep in the first place.

Edward was warm against him and smelled like soap and the sea and Alfred sighed into the kiss.

He was feeling as though his whole body had just turned into a big fluffy marshmallow, which honestly was probably how he would describe this make out session to Mina.

She would probably laugh at him, but who cared? Edward Drummond was kissing him and he was LIVING.

That is until Edward finally broke their kiss.

The latter needed to catch his breath which meant Alfred wasn’t dreaming.

The fact that they were still fully clothed was another very good pointer that he was still awake too.

Edward avoided his gaze and Alfred wasn’t sure if he was ready to face the reality either.

What if Edward had changed his mind and had kissed him because he was drunk or something?

What if this was all part of a ridiculous bet he had with Coburg?

What if Lydia was hidden nearby and would come out from her hiding spot to mock him once more?

His mother always said he had too much imagination and he was starting to really understand what she really meant by it as anxiety began to creep over him.

Which was ridiculous, honestly.

Here he was, sitting on a bench with his crush who had finally kissed him twice and he was flipping out.

He finally managed to get a grip on himself and stared at Edward who was such a lovely sight, Alfred couldn’t help himself and sighed dreamily.

Edward was blushing, his hair was a mess and his lips were slightly swollen.

He was frowning and was staring at Alfred with concern as he wondered if maybe he had done something wrong.

Which really, he hadn’t!

Edward cleared his throat, finally breaking the awkward silence that was hanging between them. ‟Sorry, I am not a very experienced kisser.”

Alfred stared back at him with shock.‟NOT AN EXPERIENCED KISSER? Are you bloody kidding me? I’m literally on the verge of fainting because of the sheer perfection of those two kisses.”

Damn, now Edward would know he literally had no chill.

There was a pregnant pause as the two stared at each other before they both burst out laughing loudly.

Alfred’s hand quickly found Edward’s in the dark and intertwined with it.

Edward slowly wrapped his other arm over his shoulder as Alfred snuggled against him and rejoiced in his warm embrace.

The fact that Alfred was feeling those firm abs under the palm of his right hand was also incredible.

Honestly, this was even better than in his dreams—except for the non-naked part, of course.

He wondered if Edward could feel his heart pounding as the latter dropped a  light kiss on the top of his head.

Edward then chuckled as he sighed with delight. ‟That’s not what I had originally planned to say, but…”

‟On the contrary, that speech was very eloquent, _Edward_.”

Oh, how Alfred loved the sound of that name. Edward. Edward. Edward. His Edward.

Edward exhaled loudly. ‟I think I’m about to pass out. Kissing you was the boldest thing I think I’ve ever done in my life.”

‟I’m glad you did it then because I’ve been dying to do so myself for a while now.”

‟You did?” Edward groaned loudly, and Alfred shuffled a bit to face him, bright blue eyes staring at dark hazel ones. ‟I’ve been wanting to kiss you since I first saw you on the beach with that tiny swimsuit of yours. I remember perfectly well what you looked like as you unfolded your towel and lounged around on the beach like the hottest and cutest thing in town. Your hair was shinning in the sun and your- I’m sorry, I’m being ridiculous. I might have drunk a bit too much rum.”

Alfred frowned. ‟I thought you had only spotted me because of my sunburn?”

Edward shrugged. ‟I’ve mustered the courage to talk to you after I saw how burnt your back was. It’s a shame I did not go and ask you if I could rub in some lotion on your skin before it happened. You’ve got such a lovely complexion…”

‟Trust me, I would have been more than happy about it. I’ve had vivid dreams of you rubbing lotion on my skin and it wasn’t  just on my back.”

Edward blushed furiously before he snorted.

Alfred leaned against him and bumped his nose against his which made Edward smile so much his teeth were glinting in the dark.

It really was the cutest thing EVER.

Alfred shuffled around and put his legs on Edward’s lap.

The latter moved the hand that was resting on Alfred’s shoulder and circled his back with it instead.

‟I want to apologize for the jogging too. It was the only logical thing that crossed my mind when I saw you looking so handsome while you were at work. I originally wanted to ask you if you’d like to go on a stroll on the beach, but I thought it would be too obvious I had a crush on you and I flipped out.”

‟Stupid me only wanted to spend some time with you. I’m not really good at sports, but I guess you have figured it out by now.”Alfred wrapped his arms around Edward’s neck. ‟What about Lydia though? I thought you liked her?”

‟I couldn’t care less about Lydia. All I’ve ever wanted was you. She’s ridiculous.”Edward scratched his nose nervously. ‟It might not really show right now, but I’m literally freaking out.  I know we’ve kissed twice already and I’m literally dying to do it again, but does this mean we are boyfriends now because I really want you to be mine?”

Gosh, Edward’s status as the man of his dreams was now officially confirmed and Alfred’s heart literally melted.

He closed the distance between them and locked his lips with Edward’s, whose lips parted as Alfred took the lead and deepened the kiss.

Edward tasted like rum and pineapple and summer and it was all very overwhelming.

He shuddered as Edward’s hand which had been resting on his back for a good five minutes now, adroitly found its way under his shirt and came to rest against the soft skin of his lower back.

It was warm and firm against Alfred’s skin and his brain officially decided to shut down.

Hotness level:+++ I’m getting a boner+.

As Alfred’s status of professional kisser was being established, Edward’s hand pursued his trip further down his lower back and began to venture under the waistline of his shorts.

Which was heavenly!

Alfred was clutching at Edward’s shirt and was slowly but efficiently bringing him down over him on the bench and everything seemed to be heading to the best make out session he had ever experienced in his life, when someone headlight flashed them, which made them both jump apart.

Heart attack: CONFIRMED.

In Fact, Alfred’s vision was kind of blurry due to the strange mix of horniness, sudden increase of light and stress he was experiencing right now.

Edward was quite the sight, but he probably looked quite disheveled himself.

He squinted and then rolled his eyes as he spotted his mum who was waving at them from her car.

 She was holding her phone in her hand and he was almost certain she had snapped a picture of them or had filmed them and had sent it to his dad who would no doubt try to have an awkward talk about safe sex with him as soon as he would be back home.

Septimus was staring at them too. He was sitting in the passenger seat and was giving them the thumbs up. He was wearing Alfred’s work uniform and he seemed to have spent the best evening of his life.

Something was definitely wrong with his twin because nothing about the ice cream shop was fun.

Alfred tried to put some order in his clothes and in his hair before he stared at Edward.

The latter was bright red.

Lobster red.

He seemed to be deep in thoughts and was probably wondering if Mrs. Paget had seen him unashamedly grab her son’s lovely arse.

Alfred seized his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze as Charlotte clearly seemed to be madly texting someone.

‟This has been very pleasant, and I can’t wait for us to continue this ehm…conversation, but I’ll have to go. Do you want my mum to drop you off somewhere?I would invite you home, but I’m sure my dad won’t want you to sleep over at my house for a good while now if my mum really sent him a video of our make out session…”

Edward nodded in Charlotte’s direction and she beamed back at him. ‟ My uncle is supposed to come and pick me up soon. I’ve texted him and I’ve told him there was alcohol at the party and he said he would come pick me up ASAP.”

They both laughed before they kissed once more and Alfred grabbed his bag and walked up to his mother’s car.

He was smiling so much his whole face was hurting when they arrived back home.

Edward Drummond was his boyfriend and today was the best day of his entire life.

***

The ice cream shop was as busy as always as both Mina and Alfred were serving their numerous customers.

Septimus was sitting close to the counter and was working on his computer; or at least, he was pretending to.

He and Mina had been exchanging heart eyes since the beginning of the evening and Alfred had rolled his eyes at the two of them for a good part of his work shift.

They were supposed to go out on a date the next day and Alfred thought this was bloody brilliant.

He had already made his best friend swear he would get to be the godfather of their first-born and Septimus was all for it too.

In the back, Ernest Coburg was sitting at his usual table with his fan club and Lydia Bennet was amongst them.

She seemed angry and bored and kept staring at her watch.

She was looking at the door too, as if she was waiting for someone to arrive.

Alfred had a little idea of who she was waiting for and oh boy, would she be displeased when she would see who Edward was really coming here for.

Of course, he couldn’t care less about her feelings.

He was fighting once more with the soft serve machine when Edward crossed the threshold of the shop a few minutes later.

He was still wearing his lifeguard shorts since his work shift had just ended and he simply looked more hotter than ever since it was paired off with a white t-shirt that was complimenting his toned physique.

Lydia’s face lit up as she spotted him and so did Alfred’s.

Edward, oblivious to her,flashed his boyfriend a grin as he walked up to Ernest’s table, pulled himself a chair and pulled one of his big books out of his bag.

Alfred’s heart was already pounding at his sight, and he sighed with anticipation as some customers were strangely looking at him.

Mina rubbed the bridge of her nose as she looked at the clock on the wall.

They still had at least three hours to go and Alfred’s concentration was now a thing of the past.

She wasn’t paid enough to deal with this crap.

Septimus smiled at her and it instantly cheered her up as an idea crossed her mind.

After all, their boss was absent for the night and they might as well take advantage of that fact, right?

‟You know what Alf? I think we deserve a second break.”Mina winked at her best friend and nudged his shoulder. ‟You only have fifteen minutes to snog the living daylight out of your bf though, lover boy.”

Alfred looked as though what she had just said was too good to be true. ‟Mina, you are the absolute best. Just yell at me and I’ll run back to you or Septimus can help you if you need him to.” He snorted. ‟The soft serve machine seems to like him better than me anyway.”

Mina chuckled as he jumped over the counter—something the clients did not seem to take well— and in two strides was at Ernest’s table.

The latter nodded in his direction as Edward quickly closed his book and pushed his chair away from the table to allow his boyfriend some room to sit on his lap.

Which Alfred did without even thinking about it twice.

Lydia Bennet scowled at the two of them.

She couldn’t believe her eyes and angrily got up as the boys were French kissing and groping right in front of her nose.

Coburg seemed to be cool with it, but she clearly wasn’t.

She opened her mouth and was about to say something nasty when both Mina Coke and Septimus Paget glared at her from their spot at the counter.

For all Alfred cared, she could mock him and yell as much as she liked, he was still the one Edward was in love with.

As she angrily walked out of the store, slamming the door behind her, Edward muttered an ‟I love you” to Alfred in between kisses and the latter began to ponder how incredible his life now was.

Summer, he thought, wasn’t overrated after all.

In fact, it wasn’t glorified enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! I can’t believe I’ve finally managed to write a shorter fic!  
> I’m now back to work full time on For Better and for worse (Only three chapters left) and then I’ve got three other Drumfred fics coming up shortly afterwards…  
> Xxxx

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and kudos are always appreciated Xxx Those keep me going :D


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